regreting. to know you

I feel regret to know him.

I mean like, aku dah kedak rosak kan iman nya ok.

bunyi kedak serius tp I mean,.

batas pergaulan nya kedak hilang.

Well maybe nya memang camya..

coz nya penah gerek dolok..

but I dont care.

So, today nya tengada mintak aku call nya.

well, jenis aku tok, aku nang sik akan call lelaki.

kecuali pasal benda penting.

well maybe first time aku kenak call lelaki is oleh classmate aku.

yang mok berbincang pasal homework.

ya pun aku rsa kdk ya Allah,.

this is my first time.

is this a sin..?

but he called me with a reason. a good reason.

to bincang about homework.

but what about si TFQ??!

IDK. maybe nya mok call just to say hi?

idk. aku biasa bermesej jak ngan nya.

and now aku rsa kdk dosa jak sebab plh kau hilang batas prgaulan.

but.. idk... dosa ka if kita calling laki empuan.??

tok calling.suka2..

hmmm....

lebih baik aku ignore kau.

sbb aku rsa aku kdk jaik jak..

aku dahla banyak berik alasan kat kau.

aku mok berkawan jak k.

sebab aku tauk kau kdk bait jak.

aku suka time aku first kenal kau,

kau berik ceramah.

kdg2 ko ajar bnda baru k.

well time 13/8 tme malam ya,.

aku bencik bena ngan kau.. hishh..

and second day,

aku rsa kdk mok bomb ko balit.

and aku berjaya bom.

hari seterusnya,. and minggu seterusnya,.

kadang2 aku bencik bena ngan kau.

hish kau sekoh. haha.

tp i just like to text you. idc.

shut the fq up.

berkawan.

yeps.

if you ignore me, I ignore you back.

i may say this is the ego in me. :(

my terrible EGO.

oh my..

kenak aku ego gilak camtok.

ok. dh gik.

kinek aku rasa kau tedah gilak dah..

sebab aku jaik -_-

patut ka sik aku tegor ko balit.

aku rasa yes.

kot..

ok. sikpa.

i think we.can still be friends.

maybe aku salah paham.

aok.

sik boleh berburuk sangka ngan orang.

netauk nya nang dah biasa gya bah.

emmm...

bah k la. bye..

i should kawan him back.. kot...

idk. tell.me. :(

I want to be.

HEY!

lamak juak blogger tok sik di duli.

Well, a lot of stuffs going on.

But I am excited for only a thing.

RUMPELSTILTSKIN DRAMA.

WEEEE! I am really excited . But I dont know why.

Maybe because I WANT TO BE a part of the drama.

I mean,

I dont really care about my position.

I dont care if I dont be picked as an actress.

But, I just really want to join the drama. And now Im joining it. I be in the Props.

I Dont Care! I love it.!

and the props thing is my stuff.

i like to be with papers, creativity and colours. lol.

but I really depends on my friends . hehe

Oh, and people says,

"gemini dont always think twice , but they will ask someone else"

hehe. its relates me :3

sometimes, I WANT TO BE a worker.

I wonder what its like to wake up at six, have a perfect breakfast and go to work at seven?

And then we have moneys!

I want to build a perfect house and live with my friends HAHAHA because on that time,

I am single. I will not live with my husband yet :b

I love my BFFTJ!

And then we will go shopping together,

Ya Allah... :')

I suddenly think that I WANT TO BE a fashion designer.

but its kinda a little bit tough.

because I must jaga aurat for that costume.

I mean, I want to bukak a costume shop,. An old fashion one.

I want to sell dresses and gowns.

i want to jual baju perang.

I want to jual superhero's costume.

hmmmhh

omg. Idk. I love it. I'll hope.....

THURSDAY #3

May be this ruined my thursday 12/09/13.

I stayed at school because I was a cameraman for my friends project. 

So,. I went to the canteen with my bijes.

They bought their food.

But there is me, still queue.

And I ended up eating sardine roll.

I wanted to buy rice.

But there was no more.

So this is another part.

We planned to eat at 2Y.

and there,.

i found Faiz (mrKOALA) sitting at a  place depan meja guru.

and his friend duduk dekat kerusi guru.

so Nida sit like, 1 chair away from Faiz.

and I sit next to nida that is 2 chairs away from faiz.

and my other bijes sit infront of me and beside me.

and then,.

they start to tease me.

with faiz.

"ktk duduk la ctok"

"aiee , facing ctok!"

"*****!!"

"hai faiz"

yes. I fuqing hate them.

and I HAVE MY OWN FEELING YOU BIJES.

I WAS EMBARRASED YOU BIJES.

and I went out of the class and

walk alone to my class.

full of boys. gees.

so,. two bfftj followed me .

and cheer me up.

it doesnt work.

so shut the fuq up while i need some alone time.

I HATE THOSE BIJES.

:'(

I CRIED.

just because I malu kay.

hmmm...

I Hate everything.

BECAUSE GHEY MADE IT FUQING OBVIOUS!

HUH.. :'(

I cant face my day with him .... anymore. fuq everything. 

brokenhearted week

HEY. its been a long time i didnt post here.

Anyway, I really dont have things to share with this online diary of JL.

hmm.. I think this is a brokehearted week for everyone.

I dont know bout them but they seems unhappy like always. And their tweets were like angry, depress, moody. but some of them were good tho. 

Yeah for me,.Its really sad for me to think about my friend to move to Kuching. :(

in the other hand, I also think about TM will end his school time at Kolej. yeh. he will never seen in my school ever again. but atleast I can see his photos online... :')

well, I hate about this.! THIS IS SO FREAKING Sad. I TRY TO MAKE SURE THAT TM IS MY LAST CRUSH IN MY SCHOOLING DAYS.

I will change myself into a better person next year if I was given another chance to live,. insha ALLAH! :D

well I hope my life is getting better.. although that somebody walk out of my life. especially my bestfriends.!! And I hope that TM will shine his parents in SPM. yeah. few weeks to go I guess? Im hoping for the best.

goodluck.

yeah and another thing ,.. I think that TM is my most special crush I guess. :')

I dont even mind saying that he doesnt have the same Religion n Race with me. but I still like him. I AM A MELANAU. AND HE IS A BERAWAN. I AM ISLAM. AND HE IS A CHRISTIAN. yeah. we have different lifestyle.

HONESTLY I LIKE TO SEE YOU WEARING A BAJU MELAYU WITH SONGKOK. <3

i really do. Thanks for whoever lend TM that baju melayu and songkok that day,. yeah. its the last moment to see you on rimup raya i guess? you wouldnt be there next year. left is me and my other seniors and juniors. :)

LIFE SPENDED. KAYY. TIME CHANGED YOUR WHOLE STORY. EVEN LOVE STORY COULD BE A DISASTER. LIFE. LIVING IN A FANTASTIC ENDING. EVERY STORY HAVE AN ENDING. EVEN LIFE HAVE ITS OWN. :')

KAY.. thats all.. <3

remembered.

Sometimes I just dont like to be reminded of an old memories and stuffs. Just because sometimes its just really touching and make me sad. just like when your bestfriend reminded the promises together that we will stay forever bfftj .. but then,. suddenly thing changes. :( and then we seperated... :( ok this is sad. I mean like, I Just dont like to be reminded about my bestfriend will lost contact!! ughhhh.. :'(
lay.. bye